Effective or Assertive Communication

Assertive communication, or assertiveness, is the ability to stand up for our rights in a way that is empathetic, respectful and, above all, does not violate the other person's rights.

Assertive communication helps a couple keep a better atmosphere at home, align their interests, build respect, have productive conversations and, in the end, keep the relationship healthy.

Getting there can be a little hard, especially if conflicts have already started and there is no good strategy for communicating. That's why we have put together some special recommendations:

• Choose the right moment to talk: Picking the right time to say things is the first step in practicing assertive communication as a couple. Keep in mind not only your own emotions but also how your partner is feeling at the moment you want to talk.
• Use the right words: Use clear, concrete words, phrases and expressions, always in a kind tone, that can encourage closeness and goodwill during the conversation.
• Always aim for honesty: You can use kind words and talk at the right moment while still being honest and open in how you communicate. That is how you can clear up misunderstandings and even keep situations that cause hurt and conflict in the relationship from happening again.
• Be aware of your body language: Assertive communication happens when you express yourself in a way that makes exactly what you mean easy to understand. That way, your message comes across clearly, your partner will understand you well, and you will even encourage them to do the same and express themselves well, which will greatly improve communication between you.
• Don't set your emotions aside: Recognizing our own emotions helps us be consistent in what we are going to say. If you feel anger, sadness or upset, for example, share it proactively. It's not about finding out who is right, but about opening up to a genuine conversation in which what we feel and what we think are expressed consistently.